cause it's frightening to be swimming in this strange sea

i feel like all i can do is post blogs. what is that even?
boy, summer is going to be full of these.
kris just told me a goofy joke.
watching dog the bounty hunter instead of packing. funny how he can be sooooo sweet after being so scary.

grrrrrrrrr. where is my motivation????

I FEEL MUCH BETTER

i have gotten to talk some things out with a few of my friends. this makes me be able to breathe and feel good about things that i SHOULD feel good about.

he introduced me as "natalie, my girlfriend" for the first time today. it felt like the first time i'd ever been introduced in such a way. which was fun. no matter my past, everything feels so different and new, and i like that. i'm an entirely different girl (and i mean that in a good way).

i do have a headache and should be studying for my play therapy final. but there are so many things i'd rather do.

I ALWAYS say i don't understand how people can "forget" to eat... until today. because i did.

such a day

i'm on the phone with at&t because there was a misunderstanding and my phone was shut off. i'm pretty sure i'm talking to carol channing... which is making me want to laugh.

it's muggy and even though i took at shower before bed i feel disgusting.

when i cleaned out my fridge i spilled green olive juice ALL over myself and no amount of dial is saving me!

i feel rushed.

i want to feel happy. and i'm trying not to let other people's opinions get to me.

<3

he did it, i am too

my boyfriend's name is kris hines. yep.

he's tall. and he's got the best smile you'll ever see. (and he just blushed)

:)

YOU'VE GOT TO BE FREAKING KIDDING ME...

staph... still running rampant through my body.

i'm about to cry.

i don't know what to do.

i don't know why i've lost (soon to be) $600 or more because people wouldn't just listen to me and write me a $4 prescription. twice i've asked and my concerns were dismissed.

now who knows, i could get stuck in the hospital...

i need hugs.

the whole truth and nothing but said truth

sorry if i offend anyone with my insensitive metaphor (or technically, it's personification)... but it's the only way i can explain it.

my phone had a stroke. it was temporarily paralyzed on the left side. i called apple. of course, they were accommodating.
BUT THEN, it just magically started working again. HOURS after troubleshooting techniques! wonderful no?

i'm hearing all about relationship problems that i don't care about from a certain roommate of mine. but i'll get over it.

i miss amber. but i'm patient.

i have NO idea what i'm doing in december after i graduate. andrea will most likely be in one of three places: russellville, new york city, or los angeles.

if she is in russellville, i will be in van buren with my parents. i will most likely substitute teach for a while because i will have an easy time getting a job there.
if she is in new york city... of course, i'll be with her. we will be fulfilling a dream that has lived longer than most... umm pets that live 5 years. haha.
if she is in los angeles... i'll probably be there too. because i've never been there and i wouldn't mind living in the sun for a while!!

i'm afraid about something. a few things.

bad luck

d22023153

that's my SECOND iphone repair id number... hopefully my last.